I know what you're thinking. If you know anything about this show, you'll recall that it was one big clusterfuck. It never really had a point, other than to showcase Iron Maiden and Iczer 1 (Iczer by means of a chroma key freeze frame in the background of nearly every show, and Maiden videos (lent to the host by ShockWave's very own Master) were as main "attractions". You may also remember that Lone Wolf, a longhaired, Maiden T-Shirt wearing, black/blue jean touting, headbangin' sunovagun, was definitely not the most charismatic host. Nor was he the most verbose. Sure, I would have an absolute field day. It would be so easy to say that the only reason Lone Wolf even applied for his own show was because of ShadowBlade's decision to finally air ShockWave Wrestling. It would make perfect sense to deduce that he wasn't much of a host. And I would totally be in the right to say that his show probably did as much to help Maiden's popularity as one would expect. But if anything, he did mature as a host no matter what anyone says. By the final, tear-evoking episode, it appeared that LW kind of had the proverbial "shit" together. He appeared much more confident in what he was doing, even if that in itself was a bit... befuddling. And, he raised interest in pirate radio broadcast. Plenty of people would show up at the Athenian Diner to sign his petition to the FCC to allow the broadcast of his station. Unfortunately, plans for the radio station fell through, and his original plan of returning to TV never materialized. In any case, for good or bad, here are the episode-by-episode mini-critiques. As Nightmare once pointed out "It was funny for all the wrong reasons". PILOT Jan. 16th, 1999 Definitely a wild ride for all involved, and the first major indicator that this show may be a disaster. Highlights include run-ins by Arron Harris, Dedboy, and the Sledge. If you ever get to see this one, note the colorful "commentary" that appears on the screen every once in a while. 1st Jan. 17th, 1999 This first broadcast episode debuted the BATM motto, "Alright, thanks again!", as well as the burning question: "What does Lone Woof mean?" The topic was Metallica's Garage Inc. Read the Transcript by SledgeHammer and Arron Harris.2nd Jan. 24th, 1999 Life doesn't get much worse for LW as he uncovers that Megadeth's drummer, Nick Menza, has been let go in favor of Jimmy DeGrasso. "We've had alot of good years with Nick, but the bands relationship with him had run its course" says Dave Mustane, former frontman, on the subject. This all occurred while Nick had taken a leave of absence to remove a benign, non-cancerous cyst from his knee. DeGrasso developed a relationship with the band while on tour with Suicidal Tendencies his at-the-time band, and while performing with Alice Cooper. Also talks about the launch of internet service provider Megadeth.net, where users can sport their loyalty by having an e-mail address i.e. joefan@megadeth.net.Notable calls include Trianchula, asking Sledge where the "video enhancer" is, another questioning of the significance of Lone Wolf (something among nothing). Other than that, this episode featured the usual rouge's gallery of dumb, drunken, high, or all-of-the-above callers, including one who sung a part of a DMX song, "The cat, the rat, itchin' the dog"... or something like that. 3rd Jan. 31st, 1999 How strange... no Iczer tonight... hmmm. Anyway, with a black background, and LW dressed in black (with the exception of blue-jeans that wreak havoc with the chroma-key), we have the makings of a very, well, "black" show, as our resident intellectual GOD LW discusses the mammoth Ozzy/Black Sabbath reunion. He also confessed his thoughts about the deceased Randy Rhodes, former guitarist for Sabbath until his unfortunate death yanked his soul from this realm. (Sledge note: that was cool... must use that line more often) Notable calls include a seemingly over-"stoked" Ozzy fan who will go on to see the Uniondale, NY show that took place on February 6th, 1999, babble on, almost incoherently, about how MTV sucks, and about how LW "rule(s) for putting heavy metal back on TV, man, especially channel 13 where there's alot of bullshit rap". Just a scant few months after BATM 13 week mission, those honors for putting metal on SKYE will go to a man known as the Metal Messiah, but that's another story.4th Feb. 14th, 1999 The 4th episode greets us with a really long intro (1:30), and it looks like Iczer's back, and she's none too thrilled. The Lone One mentions the Sgt. King Benefit Concert raising $150,000,000 (for Patrick King, police officer who was slain in the line of duty), and informs us about how Jon Bon Jovi won The Brit Award (equivalent to the US's Grammy) for best international solo artist. The award was accepted from actor Matthew McDoan and supermodel Claudia Schaeffer (LW:"Hey!"). We also alludes to Bon Jovi winning the Echo Award (Germany's music award) for most successful international artist. Info pulled from www.jonbonjovi.com.Instead of Iron Maiden, we are treated with a scene from Iczer 1, involving Iczer-Robo, and the battle betwixt Iczer 1 and 2 and the synchronization of Iczer 1 and Nagisa Kano which took up most of the 28 min. broadcast. Don't ask what it has to do with Bon Jovi. Just don't ask. Oh, here's the Maiden. All is right with the world. Notable calls include someone comparing LW to Bon Jovi (LW: Among other things. I don't think so, but thanks again."). 5th Feb. 21st, 1999 Big Gold stares at the back of one Lone Wolf as he tells us he has a video for the KISS fans out there (Hey Jenn!), and mentions the box-office bomb Detroit Rock City (which was then just coming out). He reads off an excerpt of Bill Sarley's book, Rock Stars Do The Dumbest Things, of which KISS has their own section. Ace Freely was mentioned for having tendencies to eat off everyone else's plates; Peter Criss had such a hard time remembering his lines in the 1978 TV Movie KISS meets the Phantom of the Park, that his entire part had to be redubbed, and in the early 80's had gotten drunk and fired a revolver at a Christmas tree. Why, you ask? Apparently, his wife did not let him put the star on top. Freely proposed the band be ordained by the Universal Life Church to become preachers (much like da Sledge and Arron Harris). Also mentioned, the RIAA stated that KISS's Psycho Circus video reached platinum status as of January 1999.The video "Who Wants to be Lonely" is played, and for someone claiming to be straight, Paul Stanely looks real gay... REAL gay. At least those kick-ass 80's chicks redeem this vid! Down!) Some Maiden is played later on, to maintain the continuity lost by having Big Gold instead of Iczer 1 on da key. Notable calls include Johnny B. Talking about Ace Freely playing guitar with a whammy bar and proposing a gig with J.B. on guitar, Sledge on vocals, and Da Cro on jams (Which never materializes, of course). Also, for the first time, the Altar Boys appearance is hinted to... some DARK foreshadowing occurring here! I mean EVIL! 6th March 7th, 1999 LW appears to be in good spirits tonight, as he brings forth the knowledge that Bruce Dickenson is back with Iron Maiden! Man, he is in good spirits; he even breaks out of his monotone once or twice this episode! Notable calls include the "credible/incredible" word feud. Caller: [what metal magazine] would be the most credible? LW: Most credible? Caller: And credible. LW: Incredible? Caller: And credible! LW: Incredible? Note: Sledge was in the back taking calls. This would have been the day that Justin Credible would have shown up, so he was awaiting that call as well as the viewers' calls. For more info, check the Shockwave section. 7th March 14th, 1999 This episode expounds upon, once again, that Bruce Dickenson and Iron Maiden are back together. This is also the episode that Sledge makes his directorial debut, as thoughout, messages such as, " WANTED!!! HOT CHICKS FOR THE 'Wolf's Den!'", "Abuse me more!!! I love it!", "Damn yo." and, "Feel the need? Gimme a shot! I can take ya!" harrassed the Lone One as payback for keeping Sledge on the road for 10 hours with no sleep 2 weeks before (for more info, check the Shockwave section).Notable calls include a caller letting us know that Steve Harris's b-day was going on during the past week, someone else calls telling us that he's "blowing a load" about it. And of course we must not forget the pizza order lady, who starts off sounding like she's hitting on him. On him! That is, until: Caller: "I want a large cheese pizza with sausage delivered in 30 seconds or less you fucknut." 8th March 21st, 1999 Mayhem abounds as SKYE 13's most explosive host... is a guest on this episode of BATM. Sledge guests, Big Gold is back, and there appears to be a little technical difficulty for the video they try to play. All in all a great start! Anyway, the topic is micro power radio stations. LW had wanted to broadcast for a while now, so he made up a petition to the FCC to allow his broadcast. Sledge points out that if anyone has anything useful to contribute, they should do it any way possible. He also states that you gotta respect the corporate stations; they've got the money, the talent, they went to school for it. They don't just get up and say they want to broadcast. They pay their dues, so they shouldn't all be considered evil. Lone Wolf reiterates that not all micro broadcasters are bad either, that they generally try not to interfere with other stations. Notable calls include someone with a death wish, asking to see Lone Wolf's belly. Most of the other calls were very positive in response to the topic, which was pretty cool to see. 9th March 28th, 1999 This is the dreaded live act episode featuring Joey Pineault with is rendition of his song "Life is a Hard Road", generally regarded as one of the worst live acts in Public Access history. I've heard him before, and believe it or not, he was actually pretty good! I just wonder what happened... Also there where 2 trivia questions: Who was the original singer for AC/DC? (Bon Scott) And who was the original for Iron Maiden, not Gypsy's Kiss or Smiler? (Paul Day) Notable calls basically consist of people commenting on how bad the song was. 10th This is the final episode of Bark at the Moon. He informs us that he did locate a transmitter, and that for more info regarding whether or not the show will be back up, to email him at barkatthemoon13@juno.com.LW takes a few calls, and then introduces the crew, Sledge, Nightmare, Cro, and, in a special video presentation, Colossus, the 4th crewmember (What happened to Tri and Arron?). Notable calls include: Caller: Any idea when that Joe Pineault guy will play again? LW: No idea. He really did great for himself. Caller: Yeah, too bad he has no talent just like you and he's fat and disgusting. LW: Anything else to say? Caller: Yeah. Your show sucks and I hope you die. And SW's very own Master: Caller: Yo, can I have my fucking tapes back? Notes: Johnny B. performed his "AbWave" maneuver and quickly ran offstage. Sledge ran across the camera and waved like an ass. The final video was "Fear of the Dark" by Maiden. Final quote: Running Silent,Running Deep Sink Into Your Final Sleep And thus ended BATM. The SKYE 13 public access show is owned by Cutuwulf Productions. All Rights Reserved |
Bark at the Moon is not responsible for any damage caused by the content of this show, either mental or otherwise. Skye XIII accepts no responsibility for anything that you just saw. This show was produced by an independent crew utilizing public access facilities. "...And when the fireballs work is done And we're all part of the nuclear one the whole damn thing begins again. See ya on sunday night! |
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